Trying to accept what I have been in denial about for so long makes me so depressed that I cannot get out of bed during the day.
Trying to accept that you do not see me as anything more keeps me up at night and makes me cry myself to sleep.
Trying to accept that you are not willing to fight for what we could have been makes me so lonely and alone.
What have I done to my life?
Why am I destroying it for you?
Why make the effort when you only see me as a close friend?
Do I even love you?
Or am I just challenged with the idea of you?
For almost three years, we have been together at work and I really thought we have finally "found" each other. That it was about time.
Why can't you forget her when you see me every day?
Am I not good enough for you? Too ugly?
Trying to accept that I have no control over things is so hard to do.
Especially since it ends with me not getting you.
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